( THESE DAYS )

[madison]

* MADISON JONES !
I wake up and tear drops ,They fall down like rain
I put on that old song we danced to

[/i][/font][/size]
______________________________[/center]

It was about the first day back and she had gotten a text from Nate on her way to the camp. She wasn't even looking forward to going any more, sure she wanted to see Nate but she didn't want him to see her. He hadn't seen her since she got sick, they mostly just talked on the phone and she was almost positive he was going to notice something was wrong. She had lost a lot of weight, her skin was really pale and she just looked like death. She felt like it to. Her stomach was doing all kinds of fun twists and turns and she was regretting taking the teaching job at the camp. Then again she got offered it when she wasn't as sick so she thought she could do it. Then she started chemo and she regretted every choice she made. She wasn't looking forward to seeing Emma, she knew she was going to be there and it made her glare out the window. Why did that stupid brat have to ruin everything that Nate and Madison could have had? Madison just wanted to rip her to pieces and throw them in the lake for the fish but she couldn't do that. She didn't have the strength.

That made Emma lucky. Madison couldn't beat her down the first second she saw her, then again she could always get some one else to do it for her but that would be stupid. It was her fight not some one else's. She was snuggled up warm in her bed and she really didn't want to move but she told Nate she would go down and she wasn't going to break the promise. She rested her cold clammy hands over her warm forehead and felt her stomach turn. She jumped up and dashed off to the bathroom in enough time to throw up in the toilet. If she knew it was going to be this bad she would have denied treatment and just let the stupid cancer kill her. She felt a pang of guilt because she still hadn't told Nate that she had it. She didn't want him to worry and she didn't want him to be all caring over it. She didn't want him to worry because there was a chance she could still beat it. Even if a small part of her wanted it to kill her. The didn't like, it made her look bad and it made her sick and she always felt like she wanted to jump off a roof. It made her depressed and she didn't like feeling like that.

She was almost tempted to place some new cuts on her arms, maybe it would help the depression but she remembered what Nate did last time she did that. He had a right to freak out because she went off the deep end. She had started drinking and smoking and everything else, Nate had a reason to freak at camp last year. She hung her head a bit as she pulled on some skinny jeans, cute black slip on's and a slim fit black shirt that hung off the shoulders and had a single pink thick ribbon that tied around her thin stomach. She ran a hand threw her light brown hair and fixed one of her electric blue contacts. She stretched a bit and brushed her teeth and fixed her make up. Once she was satisfied with her self she slipped her medical dog tags around her neck and stuffed them in her shirt. It was the usually diabetes one but there was a new one on it to. She was hiding that one and it just looked like the other one did.

She checked her phone as she got down to the lake and found a clear rock to sit she sighed and tugged her knees to her chest and rested her chin on the small curve. Her electric blue eyes looked up at the matching sky and she allowed a few warm salty tears to trickle down her delicate pale cheeks and splash onto the rock that she had perched her self on. The wind lightly blew back her light brown curly hair. She remembered that Nate had liked it curly so she kept it like that when she knew she would be seeing him. She just wanted him to be happy, she wanted to protect him and she knew that if he dated Emma again that he would get hurt just like last time. She wasn't good for him, he could find some one that was 10 times better for him if he just looked. Heck any one was better then Emma. She was worried she was going to make him pass out again or something from stress because she was so intense and had a worst temper then Madison. Sighing she wiped her cheeks dry and hugged her knees a bit tighter as she waited for Nate to show up. She just really wanted to go back to sleep, it was obvious she was tired.


TAGGED` Nate
STATUS`COMPLETE!
NOTES `Kinda crappy
MUSE `Coffee Muse
CREDITS `lyrics to Rascal Flatts

[/font][/blockquote][/blockquote]

[nate gray]

I'll just keep on dreamin'

[/b]
but it's cool cause we're just friends.[/center]

Nate closed his phone and sighed. It was going to be good to get to see his best friend again. It had been quite a while since they had last met, only talking over the phone and the occasional webcam chat over the past year. He wanted nothing more than to just run to her and hug her and spin her in circles. Yes, he loved his best friend. Well, not like that... like his sister. Or so he thought. He had started thinking what it would be like if they dated, then the thought had been just as swiftly taken away. She was his best friend, nothing more... right?

Either way, those thoughts didn't matter. He just wanted to see her again... especially after his run-in with Emma. Though he wasn't sure he wanted to tell Madison about it. She had gotten pissed off at Emma last year when he had fainted. Nate never blamed Em for it... he blamed the fact he hadn't been keeping up with his blood sugar... but Madison still had hatred for the girl. She would be angry as hell if Nate and Emma got back together.

Maybe she shouldn't know just yet. Besides, there were more important things for them to talk about right now. Like how the year had gone, what was new, and Nate wanted to ask her what classes she was teaching. He was pretty sure there was a group performance class they'd be teaching together. He was pretty excited about that, but wasn't sure if it was actually going to happen. He sighed and looked around his cabin. He was going to change out of the clothes he had worn to see Emma.

That was one thing about Nate, he had more clothes than probably the highest paid model in the world. Though, his amount was no comparison to his brothers'. Nate was fickle with his money, never buying anything unless it REALLY called to him. Shane and Jason just went crazy every time they saw a new store with fun clothes in it. Nate laughed and put on jeans, a white and red shirt, and a gray pull on jacket. He was tempted to wear his hat, but decided against it. He had cut his hair back a little, so he didn't really require the hat.

He walked out of the cabin, and down towards the lake. He had wanted to go on a walk, but in all honesty, the conversation with Emma had taken a lot out of him. The only person he was ever openly that honest with was Madison. It was hard to be vulnerable to more than one person. He saw brown curly hair waving in the wind before he saw her. He had told her once that he liked her hair curly because it looked natural... she'd worn it curly around him ever since. Yet he was still almost clueless on the fact she liked him. Seriously? Yeah. Unfortunately.

She was sitting on a rock, her knees to her chest, just staring at the water. If Nate had brought his camera, it would've been the perfect shot of her. She looked beautiful like that. Nate just smiled at his best friend and walked down to the rocks where she was and climbed onto the rock she was on. He was sure she heard him by now. He crouched down behind her and put his arms around her small body. Small... smaller than usual. He'd have to ask her about that later. He hugged her tightly and got up, only returning to sit beside her on the rock.

He propped his feet up on a few of the rocks around them, and looked out to the water for a moment. It was very peaceful, and he loved it. He turned his eyes back to Madison and noticed she had dark circles around them, though she had attempted to hide them with make-up. Nate was her best friend, of course he could see through the make-up. Instead of mentioning it, he figured she'd tell him about it. "Hey Madison." He said, with a smile, looking into her electric blue eyes.

Sometimes he wondered what color her eyes really were. She always had those contacts in and while the blue eyes were very attractive, he figured he would like her normal eyes better. Nate was very into people just being themselves, flaws and all. His eyes directed back towards the water. "It feels like it's been forever, and it's only been less than a year." He said, with a small chuckle. His eyes turned back to her, asking her a question. "So how have you been?" His eyes held the fact he knew there was something wrong and that she shouldn't lie to him. She knew that look.


outfit: click.
status: completed.
tags: Madison
muse: so so.
credit: michelle,bby.
lyrics: Just Friends :: Jonas Brothers[/blockquote][/font][/size]

[madison]

* MADISON JONES !
I wake up and tear drops ,They fall down like rain
I put on that old song we danced to

[/i][/font][/size]
______________________________[/center]

Madison closed her eyes and rested her head on her knees trying to relax a little bit. She had been so uptight lately, only because she was nervous about everything that was happening. She was nervous about seeing Nate again the most. And nervous that he was going to hook up with that stupid skank Emma. She had no clue what he saw in some one like Emma. She was an angry bitch that had bad hair and bad clothes and not a single ounce of talent. She didn’t even know what Emma was doing at Camp Rock. Either way Madison knew that no matter what happened Nate would still always be there for her. She knew that when this stupid mistake with Emma was over he would still be Madison's best friend and that was what she used to remind her that Emma was worthless and didn’t matter.

Yet deep down it was all just jealousy. She was so in love with Nate that it hurt her to see him with some one else. She had always sat on the side lines and supported him over the years and she never had the courage to tell him that she loved him. Not only did she love but she needed him, he kept her from falling apart. He made her happy when she was sad and he made her smile when ever she was crying her eyes out. He was her life; she needed him to see that especially if she might not have that much of it left. Sure she had been keeping the thought of death out of her head but it was starting to edge its way back in and she hated it. She hated thinking about the fact that if the treatments she was taking didn’t work then she wouldn’t live to get married, she wouldn’t live to see what happened with Nate over the years. As odd as it sounded she wanted to grow old with him. Not always in a romantic way but as best friends until they were both old and gray sitting on rocking chairs on a porch some where. Even if she never got to date him she was always going to spend as much time as she could with him no matter what.

She was spacing out so much that she didn’t even hear foot steps behind her, she jumped a little as she felt some one wrap their arms around her and she smiled a bit but her heart dropped into her stomach. She wanted to see him yet she didn’t because she knew that she couldn’t lie to him. How could she lie to her best friend? When he spoke she couldn’t help but lock her eyes with his and sighed. He was giving her that look, the look that she knew he knew something was wrong. “hey Nate” She spoke with a small smile. She shivered and rubbed her arms and scooted closer to Nate. She draped his arm around her back so she could snuggle against him for warmth. It was warm out but she was still really cold. She was glad that he was here, she was his best friend and she still didn’t know why she was keeping being sick such a big secret. She figured she would just play it off for as long as she could, or at least until he got the answer out of her. She felt her stomach turn and she pressed a hand to it and whimpered a little. Now was so not the time to get sick.

“Yeah it really does feel like it has been forever. It’s sort of funny how much you can miss some one even if they just live down the street.” She smirked a little bit knowing very well that during the year they could have seen each other if they wanted to. Sure they hung out but it wasn’t as much as they used to and it made her sort of sad. She really hoped he didn’t run into Emma again. Madison needed her best friend and she didn’t want Emma to take him away from her. She needed him to be there for her and help her even if she wasn’t going to tell him why. When he asked how she had been she simply shrugged and rested her head lightly on his shoulder as she looked out at the water. “Kinda sick but that’s about it.” She left it at that. “Working on my new album and stuff.” She whispered a little and closed her eyes. She really just wasn’t feeling good right now. “What about you? Anything new?” Of course she wanted to know every thing about Nate’s year but she just wanted to know what was on his mind. Anything to get his mind off her.

"its pretty cool being a counselor now though isnt it. I mean now we get to run the show and make all the choices and teach the kids how to do stuff. And we get to teach guitar together." She was really looking foward to teaching a class with him because she knew that it would be really fun. They would get to teach kids what they knew, kids that looked up to them and what not. Plus that meant she would get to steal him away to make lesson plans and work on stuff to teach. She was so glad that her and Nate were going to have a chance to sing together again and work together again. It had been a while since they actualy performed together and she wanted to change that. She had a lot of songs she wanted to play for him and get his oppinion. They were going on her new album and sadly enough most of them were about Nate. She hated the fact she couldnt get him out of her head. She didnt like thinking about him all the time when she knew she couldnt have him. She ignored her own thoughts and looked back out at the lake as the water rippled lightly in the wind.


TAGGED` Nate
STATUS`COMPLETE!
NOTES `Kinda crappy
MUSE `Coffee Muse
CREDITS `lyrics to Rascal Flatts

[/font][/blockquote][/blockquote]

[nate gray]

I'll just keep on dreamin'

[/b]
but it's cool cause we're just friends.[/center]

Madison grabbed Nate's arm and dropped it around her shoulders, bringing her a little warmth. It wasn't that cold, and Madison never did that stuff unless she needed it, which initially worried him. He looked around, then back at her. Honestly, he didn't care if anyone saw him with his arm around his best friend. People knew Nate and Madison's relationship... this was just how they worked. He was there for her no matter what, and she was there for him.

Though he wasn't sure that would last when she found out him and Em had gotten back together. Nate was happy as ever about it, but he knew Madison would hate it, and if she was sick in any way, the last thing he wanted to do was make her miserable. Instead of dwelling on his thoughts, he commented on her statement. "Eh, not so much. You see, you and I are the neighbors who aren't ever actually home to annoy the hell out of each other." He said, smiling and tightening his grip around her arms.

She was shivering a little and it scared Nate. Kinda sick? It was seventy degrees outside and she was shivering. That wasn't kinda sick. He raised an eyebrow. "Madison, you'd tell me if something was seriously wrong, right?" He asked, wanting her to reassure him that she was okay, and to settle his nerves a little.

She said something about working on her new album. Seriously? He decided to voice his thoughts. "Seriously? That's pretty awesome! I can't wait to hear it!" He said, smiling down at her, then looking out towards the water. It was funny how the two became best friends through camp, and how they were basically growing up together. Madison was famous, and so was Nate. She helped him through it because she knew how it felt.

He shrugged. "Nothing new, really." He said, shrugging. "I've written a few songs over the past year, but nothing too epic. I'm working on the songs Connect Three will be performing throughout camp. Shane's too worried about impressing Mitchie to do it, and Jason is still pestering Shane about that stupid birdhouse he never made for him." Honestly, that was one of the funniest things Nate had ever witnessed... Jason's determination to get a birdhouse from his younger brother.

Deciding it'd probably be better to go ahead and tell Madison now rather than later, he coughed and mumbled, "Ohandmeandemmaarebacktogether." He had said, oh, and me and emma are back together. But it was all one big run-on word. If she had heard it, then okay. If she hadn't, then he could say he had told her. He honestly didn't want to hear the reaction. He could feel the tension already between the two, just from talking to Emma earlier... but Madison already seemed ill, he didn't want to make it worse. Better now than later, right?

He nodded about the classes. "Yeah, I'm pretty excited, actually. I'm doing the songwriting class by myself this year... so I have two classes. But I think our class will rock. Mitchie's taking it, so I'm pretty excited about that one. Shane's definitely depressed. He thinks she should be in ALL of his classes." Nate just laughed at the idea. Nate and Mitchie were really close friends, and he wasn't sure about Madison's opinion on the girl. But hey, why not get the confrontational subjects out of the way at the beginning of the summer? That left room for fun the rest of it.


outfit: click.
status: completed.
tags: Madison
muse: trying to hide.
credit: michelle,bby.
lyrics: Just Friends :: Jonas Brothers[/blockquote][/font][/size]

[madison]

* MADISON JONES !
I wake up and tear drops ,They fall down like rain
I put on that old song we danced to

[/i][/font][/size]
______________________________[/center]

Madison let a small smile cross her face and she nodded a bit looking up at him. "Yeah thats true I guess we are always to busy to hang out with each other. But I guess that just comes with the territory of being famous. At least we know what we are going threw and we can actually say I know how you feel." She spoke with just a small laugh. She wasn't really in the mood to laugh right now. How could she possibly tell him what was really on her mind, he would hate her if she told him what was really going on with her. She had so many things floating in her mind that it was making her light headed. She took a deep breath and wrinkled her nose a bit.

Should she tell him? "I want to tell you every thing Nate but I don't know if I should. I mean I don't want you to worry at all. And if I told you I know that you would worry. And I can worry enough for the both of us trust me but I know that if I don't tell you then you are just going to give me that look until you do." She took another deep breath and pouted a little bit. She still didn't know how to tell him so she was just going to spit it out. "I just got diagnosed with leukemia....which is cancer." She shrugged away from him and tugged her knees to her chest. she still got kind of choked up when she said it so she was fighting tears back at the moment. She could feel her stomach twisting and turning and she really felt sick this time. She didn't know why she felt guilty for telling him and now she wished that she could take it all back.

She was happy to have something else to talk about and get her mind off of it. "Maybe we should just make him a bird house so he can leave poor Shane alone. And he seriously needs to stop worrying about Mitchie. They would make a totally cute couple. They are like perfect for each other." Madison didn't have a problem with Mitche, she only hated Emma because she didn't have a reason to hate Mitchie. Plus she thought Shane and Mitchie would make a really cute couple. Maybe her and Nate could assist in match making, she was totally willing to give Shane a little shove toward Mitchie. After all some one at this camp needed to be happy. And that clearly wasn't going to be her for much longer. She was so not ready for the shock that was about to hit her.

Madison's eyes got wide and her mouth hung open a little bit. Shaking her head she tried to process what Nate just said. She opened her mouth to say something but no words came out. Instead she felt her stomach do a full flip and she jumped off the rock and was quickly throwing up behind a ditch. Now she felt a little bit better after throwing up, she just hated that it had to be because of something that Nate said. Well she was actually feeling worse. Shaky and even more pale she didn't bother sitting back down. "You really don't waste any time do you. What ever, if you want to get your heart broken again then go ahead and give it to some one whose just going to break it into a bunch of tiny little pieces and kill you like she almost did last year." Her voice wasn't harsh like she wanted it to be. It was quiet and soft. She couldn't fight back the tears any more and they spilled down her delicate pale cheeks. She lost her chance again. Her chance to date him and love him, she lost it to Emma again. it wasn't fair Emma got everything she wanted.

And Madison got nothing. Sure she had everything but she didn't want it. it wasn't what she wanted, what she wanted was love. Some one to love her and care about her and be there for her. She was never going to get that with Nate and that was the only person she wanted to love. She clutched her stomach and went back to her bush and threw up again. She pulled a water bottle from her bag and rinsed her mouth out and drank some. She felt so gross for throwing up and she hated it, but she did have to admit it kept her thin. She sat back on the rock but didn't sit cuddled up with him like she was before. He had a girl friend now, it would be pointless for her to get close to him. "Yeah I am doing a vocals class by my self to. I think or some other people are doing it to. i don't really remember any more." Everything she was supposed to remember had just left her brain and she just looked back out at the lake wish Nate wouldn't have told her about him and Emma. That totally just ruined her day. Now he was going to be busy with Emma and she doubted he would have time to help her threw what she needed help with. She sighed and shook her head and rested it on her knees with a little laugh. "This year is going to be difficult isn't it?" She asked turning her head lightly to look at him.


TAGGED` Nate
STATUS`COMPLETE!
NOTES `Kinda crappy
MUSE `Coffee Muse
CREDITS `lyrics to Rascal Flatts

[/font][/blockquote][/blockquote]

[nate gray]

I'll just keep on dreamin'

[/b]
but it's cool cause we're just friends.[/center]

She was babbling, and he was about to tell her to just spit it out when she did. Cancer? He knew what Leukemia was. He had heard of people having it before, but had never thought twice about it. No one he knew ever had it. He was a little thankful that it wasn't something else, though. Leukemia was one of the smaller cancers that was easier to treat and be in recession for. But still, it was scary as hell.

How far into it had she been diagnosed? Was she already starting treatment? Was she going to be okay? His mind ran through so many questions as she continued talking. At this moment, how could she even talk about Mitchie and Shane? His mind was still processing the cancer. "Madison... oh my God." was all he said, still thinking about his best friend having cancer. He wouldn't cry. No, only Madison had the right to do that, but he felt like his world was falling apart. He literally couldn't live if he lost that girl.

Then she jumped to Emma and Nate dating. Damn that girl could switch subjects fast. He flinched a little when she stood up and threw up. Damn. Damn. Damn. Damn. Damn. He stood up as well, but not to follow her. Madison hated it when she was weak in front of him, and he wasn't going to help her out... not just yet. He was the comfort after the storm. It's what he had always been. He heard what she said and sighed. "And that may happen, it may not. But it's my decision, Maddie." He said, shrugging. He really didn't want to add fuel to the fire... but he wanted her to understand that he was doing this for himself.

He looked at her eyes as if she had lost everything. She couldn't see how much he truly did love her, could she? No, it wasn't in the way she wanted him to, and he finally could see that. But he did love her with his whole being. He would be there for her through everything she ever went through. He was a shoulder to cry on, a wall to lean on, and a hug whenever she needed it... but it wasn't enough. It probably wouldn't ever be, and it'd probably be easier for her if he left her side.

But he wasn't going to. They were best friends for a reason, and that reason was because they understood each other. They could talk about anything and everything. He could tell her things the rest of the world would never have the privilege of knowing. And he wasn't going to even risk losing that. She could be crazy depressed right now, but he wasn't going to let that come between them. Nor would he let her push him away if he tried.

When she sat back down, she didn't sit close to him. He sighed. It was probably because she didn't want people to talk. Hell, why did it matter? People knew they were best friends. That's just how they worked. And besides, there was no one around. She said something about teaching classes and he ignored it. They could talk about camp stuff later. He was still worried about this cancer ordeal.

Not caring that she had just thrown up... he could take a shower later... he walked over and stood in front of her on the rocks. He crouched down and sat in front of her, facing her. "Madison Ray Jones... this is something I can't understand. The cancer. I've never had it, and I've never gone through it. So I won't be able to tell you that I know how you feel." He grabbed her hands that were laced in her lap. "But I will tell you that I will do whatever it takes to make you healthy again. I'm not taking any chance of losing you."

He stood up, and grabbed her hands, pulling her up with him. He wrapped his arms around her shoulders and pulled her close to him in a hug. "I'm not going anywhere." He said, reassuring her as best he could that they were best friends and that wasn't going to change just because he was dating Emma again. Emma understood they were best friends, and hopefully it would be a little easier on the two girls this summer.


outfit: click.
status: completed.
tags: Madison
muse: trying to hide.
credit: michelle,bby.
lyrics: Just Friends :: Jonas Brothers[/blockquote][/font][/size]